i am fucking miserable.

i miss everyone. where are you all :( i have lost all contacts due to demise of both phones (don’t bother contacting msian number)! me so lonely. but thank you bb inti hollie jy ddt tocktopher my siao ding dong monkey maine (only person who can make me laugh like siao at 5am wtf) and all my plurk friends especially richkid swei & kittyrat aka mr-soon-to-be-dr cheong hei <3 and omg quote of the day: “like all women, i have my ideal of manhood.” lol sonya you very explicit ahahahah. ok she didn’t know the duality when she posted it, but hahaha makes it even funnier!

i’m so free in december all my plans have vanished. some things cannot be helped lah but still very sad (hm hope your mom gets better <3). ok la got at least 10-15 friends to meet but still! like that only 10 days. what about the remaining 20 days! i promise i won’t be emo or overly bitchy ok :( why unhappy face eyes so small 8( ahh much better. like the shrek puss in boots hehe.

ok sushi just came online and told me to go sleep T.T thanks ah. haih why i so desperate. sushi take good care of yourself ok!! you still have to take me to eat tau nga gai one!!! december’s gonna be a long month. why do i always have sad/lonely christmases? so depressing maybe i should change my nick :( well my last two xmases were on planes, so at least this one i can dunno, sleep at home or sth. i still wanna go japan 8( i miss snow.

and i’m obsessed with molly. it’s like a morbid fascination. she looks so cute but yet so scary. just cannot seem to get enough of it. and tofu also!! tofu molly XD waiting for the tofu molly son now. i want smery to-fuuuu! see why i don’t blog much anymore because i’m awfully boring. yawn.

i can’t wait for friday! new things and avenue q~ let’s go stuff ourselves silly with halloween candy hehs.

43 lessons that MUST be learned in relationships
1. IF A MAN WANTS YOU, NOTHING CAN KEEP HIM AWAY. IF HE DOESN’T WANT YOU, NOTHING CAN MAKE HIM STAY.
2. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
3. If you have ANY doubt in your mind about a man’s character, leave him alone.
4. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
5. STOP TRYING TO CHANGE YOURSELF FOR A RELATIONSHIP THAT’S NOT MEANT TO BE.
6. Don’t force an attraction.
7. SLOWER IS BETTER.
8. NEVER LIVE YOUR LIFE FOR A MAN BEFORE YOU FIND WHAT MAKES YOU TRULY HAPPY.
9. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no you can’t “be friends.” A friend wouldn’t mistreat a friend.
10. Don’t settle.
11. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
12. If he keeps changing his mind about the relationship–take that as a BIG sign that he is unstable. Do you really want to be with a man like that?
13. Don’t stay because you think, “it will get better.” You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
14. Honorable men take care of their business and aren’t involved in a whole lot of mess.
15. The only person you can control in a relationship is you.
16. THERE’S ONLY ONE ‘REASON’ A MAN DUMPS YOU; HE DOESN’T WANT YOU.
17. Avoid men who’ve got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn’t marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?
18. You really do have to kiss a few frogs before finding the prince.
19. Always put yourself and your happiness first.
20. Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
21. MAINTAIN BOUNDARIES IN HOW A GUY TREATS YOU. IF SOMETHING BOTHERS YOU, SPEAK UP.
22. Like from the show Sex and the City, if he doesn’t call, he just isn’t that interested.
23. Be honest and upfront.
24. Know when to cut the cord; don’t be strung along.
25. Don’t fall for the “I’m confused role”. Remove yourself from the situation
to let him figure things out (but don’t wait for him, move on).
26. if you want to have a clue as to how he will treat you, watch how he treats the WOMEN in his family (not just mom).
27. there’s more than physical abuse, there’s emotional and mental abuse. If he causes any of them…flee.
28. You cannot change a man’s behaviors. Change comes from within.
29. Don’t let him place rules on you that he is not willing to follow himself — double-standard.
30. Don’t EVER make him feel he is more important than you are…even if he has
more education or in a better job.
31. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
32. Demand respect and if he can’t give it, he can’t have you!
33. Don’t compete with other woman, but be aware that men are attracted to what they see.
34. If you think he is cheating, he probably is. Confront him right away and if you feel he’s lying, let him go.
35. Actions speak louder than words.
36. Never let a man define who you are.
37. Never rely on a man for compliments, look to yourself for that.
38. Never borrow someone else’s man.
39. If he cheated with you, he’ll cheat on you.
40. JUST BECAUSE HE SAYS HE LOVES YOU, DOESN’T MEAN THAT HE WON’T HURT YOU AND IT DOESN’T MEAN THAT YOU ARE MEANT TO BE WITH HIM.
41. To use painful hard-won wisdom — ‘get it right’ the next time.
42. Know that you deserve to be the number one person in the life of the #1 person in your life.
43. Love is a verb…

hihi i just changed the fonts! will be tweaking more tomorrow. i like this theme but it doesn’t support widgets or any other plugins ugh. i think the categories part on the sidebar takes up damn a lot of space >( omg i bought these jetlag pills and i actually feel sleepy yay okay uh yes i will be updating the about me page, to not sound so pretentious (wtf that was written like 2 years ago) as well as the about the site page, and i will be thinking about whether to link anyone at all (yes i’m antisocial har-dee-har). i might just link random people. misc page to store all random pages is up, not that i have many pages… my quotes pages are very backward, and i might have a french quote page up soon. i’m still not satisfied with my sidebar, and i think i really have to do some self-promotion after my exams. i kinda lost a lot of readership due to the recent closure, bollocks. anyway i will have more time for this blog in december since japan/malaysia/australia/cambodia trips are ALL off (heart damn pain) and i think i have no plans for december anymore wtf probably just sleep at home everyday sigh. see la i knew december was too good to be true *mutters*

will blog tomorrow lah! stupid medicine so effective >:(

edit: i’m sorry if you hate music on blogs, i love ‘em! i think it’s a great way to listen to new music. i love how my layout looks now! the favicon thingy doesn’t work bleurgh, will fix that some other time. i love personalising my site :D

Sometimes I admire people who just write and write everyday. I used to be part of that group who scoffed at others’ daily mundane updates of their boring lives. Yet they are the ones who win in the end, because they have a keepsake of their memories and their everyday lives. I don’t want to be like them - rather, I’d want to have a meaningful, fulfilling life AND keep my experiences recorded too. Though sometimes my words fail to describe my emotions, and I delete my halfdone entry because it didn’t seem to justify it.

Heck, I want to be one of those frivolous girls who blog about their shopping and their new hair or how they lubb theiir boyfr13nd5.

*reads line above. pukes. cleans puke up.*

Okay I was kidding. But I will make an effort to write more frequently. (Yea you know she always says this but…) & pictures! Word-only blogs suck. Bye for now. Exam tomorrow. Going to watch a movie. Err… I mean study. /end randomness